Ever since I was little, I dreamed
about being a mom. I had this idealized picture of what being a mom would be
like. My husband and I had a plan. We wanted three kids, just like we'd both come from three child families. We'd enjoy two or three years of marriage just the two of us,
then we'd start trying for a baby. The timing would allow us to get some things
"in order," like buying a house, and finishing my teaching
credential.
Fast forward to three years later
when we were finally ready and things didn't go as planned. After about 9
months of trying, I saw my ObGyn for my routine yearly appointment. No biggie,
right? Well, as is typical, he asked about our birth control plans and I
mentioned we were trying to get pregnant. He immediately asked how long we'd
been trying. I told him at about 9 months, which to me didn't seem like that
long at all given that I'd been on the pill for a while and my periods were
still kind of wonky. He was concerned, which in turn freaked me out. He
immediately started talking about fertility treatments and testing. I was shell
shocked. He said to come back in 3 months if nothing changed.
Well two months later I experienced
the worst abdominal pain of my life. It woke me out of my sleep. Still I figured it
was just something I ate, popped some ibuprofen and tums, and hoped for the best. The
next day I started to experience tenderness on my left side, digestive pain,
and some bleeding. I went in to the doctor, thinking
it was digestive (given my history of digestive issues). She, however, was more concerned
about a mass she felt near my left ovary. Great. I left her office with an
ultrasound order, the directive to see a gastroenterologist and gynecologist
ASAP, and a huge dose of anxiety.
Turns out I had two issues, one
digestive (a bleeding fissure), and an ovarian cyst. The gynecologist dismissed
the cyst, telling me it'd just go away on its own. And since I still wasn't
pregnant, and we'd reached that 3 month mark, he went ahead and recommended I
start fertility drugs while I waited for the results of fertility testing. I
was adamant that the testing and results should come before I considered
fertility drugs, so didn't fill the prescription. I gave blood samples and had
a hysterosalpingogram (HSG). An HSG is basically an x-ray of the uterus and
tubes to check for structural deformities. The radiologist noted that I had
some blockages that appeared to clear as the dye passed through the various
structures. Everything else came back normal, so I had hope that we'd be pregnant
soon.
But that was put on hold for another
month as I underwent a colonoscopy and endoscopy to investigate the fissure.
When I was cleared of colon cancer I was given strict orders to avoid NSAIDs
(ibuprofen, naproxen, and such) and to control my acid reflux with medication
and diet to avoid cancer in the future. So I began a new course of acid reflux drugs, and we were cleared to keep trying for a baby.
A little over a month later, right
before Halloween, I decided to take a pregnancy test as I had many times
before. As bent down to grab the instructions I'd dropped to check the timing
on the results, I was surprised to find it already positive. It had been maybe
a minute and a half. I was shocked and relieved. I sobbed and thanked God. I was
so excited to tell my husband when he got home from work less than an hour later. We were both overjoyed.
Three days later on Halloween the
morning sickness hit, and I nearly vomited in my classroom. The office sent me
home thinking I had the flu. They were shocked to see me back the next day.
"Must have been a 24-hour bug," I said. Haha. I struggled with
morning sickness my whole first trimester. My only relief was SeaBands, ginger
candies, and constantly eating or drinking. It was so very hard to hide my pregnancy from
my students and coworkers. I tried to pass it off as my stomach issues. I even
caught a nasty cold at 7 weeks. IT WAS THE WORST. You can't take anything to
help your misery.
At 9 weeks, I finally got in to see
a new doctor. Everything looked good, I even seemed to be measuring ahead of my due
date. A week later, while my husband was traveling for work, I had my first
official ultrasound. I was SHOCKED to find out I was having twins! I couldn't
stop laughing, I really thought she was joking. But when I saw them both on the ultrasound screen I knew
it was real. I immediately tried to call my husband, but the time difference
wasn't working in my favor as it was already late and he was 3 hours ahead. I
had made a coffee date with a girlfriend that night. I was already running late, so I headed over. It was so hard not to tell
her, but I wanted my husband to be the first to know. Finally he called back
while I was with her, but I waited until I was in the car headed home to call him
back. To say that he was in disbelief was an understatement. He was sleepy and
couldn't quite wrap his head around it. Eventually, we were both excited by the
prospect of having a boy and a girl, and being "all done" in one
pregnancy. HA!
My second trimester was great. My energy was back, my morning sickness was more tolerable. in fact everything was going as planned. So my doctor didn't force me into early maternity leave. She let me continue teaching
until I felt I needed more rest. So at 31 weeks 4 days, I took leave with just
3 weeks left of the school year. I did my best to relax, until one morning I woke up
feeling off. I went in for my routine (now twice weekly) checkup and found out
I was in preterm labor at 33 weeks, 3 days. From there things got progressively
worse...
No comments:
Post a Comment